Tuchel’s Crimes Against Football
July 15, 2026 will go down in football history as the day Thomas Tuchel carried out the greatest crime against football in modern World Cup history. The final score of the World Cup final reads 2-1 in favor of Argentina.
The headline could be, “British Hopes and Dreams Murdered by a German” like we haven’t heard that before.
Or, “It’s Not Coming Home” is also appropriate.
England, take the lead through a touch of class from Anthony Gordon, sit back for 35 minutes. They accumulated 12% possession after the first goal was scored. You read that right: 12%. It’s so extreme it’s unbelievable, yet it’s true. Argentina averaged 62 seconds in possession, while England averaged 8 seconds in possession. The data is clear: Tuchel’s direction after taking the lead was hunker down and hold on. He reinforced this choice by bringing on another defender.
English fans have a right to be angry, yesterday was avoidable and Tuchel’s contract through 2028 needs to be reconsidered. Fans of the three lions can reasonably predict what Tuchel will do in key moments in big tournaments. It’s not speculation that poor tactical choices should be expected under pressure in key moments when you have new data that supports it.
if England stand behind Tuchel, they are sending a message of support for a manager over the good of the players, the fans and national footballing prosperity.
We asked self described soccer newbs what they’d have done differently and nearly all of their responses made more logical common sense than what Tuchel chose to do yesterday. Newbs! From America! Imagine!
The FA needs to sack Tuchel, begin the search for a new manager, and prioritize an English manager. Tuchel’s actions yesterday were criminal, arguably as bad as Maradona’s hand of God, and they will go down in soccer lore as the day music died in English soccer